Autism

The Big Reveal, Part 2: My dilemma

If you read Part 1 of “The Big Reveal”, you know that I gave you my “In a Nutshell” story of how I got to this place in my life.  If you forgot already (or didn’t read the first part, in which case “shame on you”!  Just kidding!), I’ll “bottom line” it for you:  I spent about 45 years not knowing I had Asperger’s AND I am the very proud mother of a 10 year old boy, who also has autism.  Oh, plus, I am a dyed-in-the-wool crafter (now being called “maker”) and have been since I was a kid.  Plus I am a rabid fan of corgis!  <—“rabid”…heehee…get it?

So here is the dilemma: as someone who was diagnosed late in life, I don’t just naturally think about Asperger’s and autism.  Truth be told, I don’t think about it all that much until I run into a situation I can’t figure out and then I have an “Aha!” moment.

No, mostly I think about what I can make or do…or cook…or clean…or organize.

I suppose it might be a little bit “Aspie” of me that I have a need–a compulsion, really–to analyze things that grab my curiosity and figure them out.

Yeah.  I’m that person.

I’m the lady that looks up word origins for the fun of it.  The gal who sees something odd–like: “Hey! Why have all the Hess gas stations changed names? And: “Now where am I going to get my annual Hess Truck?”–and must research it and find out “why”!  (Here’s the why: Hess decided to get out of the retail business in New England, so you have to buy the annual truck online if you live around here.)

Thing is…I always thought everyone was like I was.  I mean, how can you just look at something and not think about it?!?   It is part of my very core to find out the “back story” of everything…and EVERYTHING has a back story.  Hardly anything is happens for NO reason at all.  Believe me…it doesn’t.  I researched it.  LOL!

And that’s one of the reasons why I simply ADORE my son, Master Owen (aka MO)!  He thinks just like me; he was blessed with this insane need to find out the “whys” and “hows” of life.  Because, honestly?  Having this drive of curiosity is the BEST way to live life, especially in the digital age when you can find out anything online.  It makes life a ginormous ADVENTURE.

Only…I now realize not everyone is “so blessed”. <big grin>  Some people are content with not knowing the history of the Patriots mascot.  (You are now dying to know, aren’t you?)

Some people can actually admire someone’s work without asking: “How did you do that?”

It was a shocking revelation to me and, quite frankly, something I still struggle with.

And–take it a step further–how am I suppose to maintain a blog simply about autism?  Won’t that get boring or whiny?  Seriously…autism is part of who I am…of course it is, but it is NOT all of me.  Of course not.   I am so much more! I am the mittens I knit.  The birthday banners I design.  The tote bags I sew up.  The lobster pie I make.  The dog poop I diligently collect and dispose of <gross, I know!>   I am all those things and more.  I can’t contain myself.  And, what’s more, I won’t contain myself.

And, so, the “Big Reveal” is I NEED to blog about, well, everything.

Corgis, LEGO sets, Cricut crafting, knitting, sewing, soap making, DIY…and, like I said, everything.  You name it and I’m giving myself permission to write about it.  I can’t be a one woman show.  It’s too restricting.  And I’ve spent way too much of my life trying to fit into everyone else’s ideas of who I am.

Is that all right with you, dear reader?  Will you come along on a journey with me?  Or at least tolerate it when I just want to gush about my latest project?  I do hope you will, because I want to share it all with you!

Let me know in the comments below, won’t you?

P.S. I write like I think, so I sometimes have run on sentences.  Plus I use a lot of exclamation points and ask a lot of questions.

P.P.S. I’m a HUGE fan of the “P.S.”

 

 

4 thoughts on “The Big Reveal, Part 2: My dilemma

  1. Strangely enough that is how I feel, have felt all of my life.I HAD to know how things work, why things happen, what are things for and so on. I’ve always felt different and came to the conclusion that I wasn’t like other people and actually felt quite happy about it. I value being alone and felt really put out if people “drop in” unexpectedly. I prefer that they give me at least two weeks notice. If I need social interaction I go out. I have a number of interests and hobbies. Human interaction always puzzled me and I still don’t understand why or how people do things especially if they are married or in relationships. I’ve lived with dogs as companions ever since I left home 40 odd years ago. I’m probably aspergers or autistic spectrum but I’m not really interested in finding out at this point in life. Anyway, this probably far too much information from someone who you only vaguely know from Facebook and Corgi interests. I enjoyed reading your posts. You’ve got an avid audience, keep writing and I’ll keep reading.
    Scooter

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s